What does Subway Reuben have to do with Bill Haley?

The Subway Reuben is back for a limited time. The restaurant chain introduced its version in 2016.

By JOHN E. BIALAS
Broadmoor Bureau Chief

What does the Subway Reuben have to do with Bill Haley’s “Rock Around The Clock?”

Why use one of the greatest rock and roll songs of all time as the soundtrack for a TV commercial promoting Subway’s take on a classic American sandwich?

If you haven’t seen the commercial, here’s an abbreviated clip.

“Rock Around The Clock” signifies the rise of rock and roll in the 1950s, when English Teddy Boys were rioting and American teens were dancing in theaters because of the movie “Blackboard Jungle,” the tale of high school delinquents that opens with Haley’s song. I doubt the student thugs were rocking with a Reuben sandwich after trying to switch-blade their new teacher.

You can get a Rock and Roll Reuben, not at Subway but at Southway Pizzeria and Delia in Lewiston, Idaho. A customer described it as “a fantastic experience” featuring “fresh cuts of corned beef with little to no unwanted fat.”

The Subway Reuben shown in the commercial looks disgusting, and the food in TV ads is supposed to be tempting.

The Subway version of rye bread, corned beef, Swiss cheese, sauerkraut and Thousand Island dressing is nothing I would associate with 1950s diners, which are part of the visuals in the ad.

I’d prefer a big cheeseburger and a large chocolate malt. That’s what I associate with a diner. You know, Mel’s in the TV show “Alice” and Arnold’s/Al’s Drive-In in “Happy Days,” which used “Rock Around The Clock” as its theme song in its first season.

Since the Subway Reuben appears to be a wreck of a sandwich, I wish Haley’s 1954 hit was never associated with the ad.

Somebody needs to do a parody of the ad. This would be in the late Frank Zappa’s wheelhouse. The leader of the Mothers  of Invention came up with such 1960s albums as “Cruising with Ruben and the Jets,” “Lumpy Gravy” and “Uncle Meat.”

I imagine a Zappa cover of The Hombres’ “Let It All Hang Out” as a Subway parody in which lyrics would be revised and sung in the style of “Ruben and the Jets” doo wop.

Nobody knows what the Subway Reuben is all about,
It’s too much, man,
Let weasels rip my flesh,

Cook up  a Burnt Weeny Sandwich,
Let it all hang out

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Company Burger makes up for Whataburger

The double cheese at the Uptown Company Burger in New Orleans is burger bliss. JOHN E. BIALAS

By JOHN E. BIALAS
Broadmoor Bureau Chief

Lunch at Company Burger in Uptown New Orleans on Saturday more than made up for my recent  experience at Whataburger in Gulfport, a disaster that led to a Perc360.com post.

Doug Barber and I went to Company Burger before the retired sportswriter, Biloxi Sports Hall of Famer and longtime friend took me to the South Florida-Tulane football game at Yulman Stadium.

I got the double cheese, fries and a bottled Barq’s Root Beer with a cup of ice.

The double cheese was two-at-one-time perfection. It was burger bliss. Hot, fresh and juicy with onions, pickles, mustard and ketchup.

A New Orleans restaurant critic from long ago would have called this a platonic dish. It’s far better than anything you can get at a national burger chain.

I had worked up an appetite after Doug let me make a stop at Stein’s Deli to buy a loaf of the best egg bread you will find anywhere.

Stein’s was packed because of what I call “The Blake Lively Effect.” The actress said on a TV show that Stein’s is one of her go-to places when she is in New Orleans, and now everyone wants to go there. I guess Mrs. Ryan Reynolds has that kind of influence.

Just up the street is Tracey’s, a bar and po-boy restaurant Doug and I went to after lunch. It’s a hangout for watching a lot of football games and the place was busy when Doug and I were there, only to get crazy busy hours later for the LSU-Ole Miss telecast.

It’s SRO when the Tigahs are on TV whether it’s morning, noon or night, though Tracey’s might need a bigger place if it ever got The Blake Lively Endorsement.

Doug, who has season tickets, says he wishes the Green Wave football team could be as exceptional as the fan experience Tulane provides. Season-ticket holders have a number of parking lots to choose from, and Doug’s lot is across from St. Rita Catholic Church.

Shuttle buses are available and they take you to and from the stadium, and they run in a timely manner. No waiting and no long lines.

Tulane gave South Florida quite a challenge after it appeared the game would be a rout. The final: Bulls 34, Green Wave 28.

The slant pass put Tulane back in the game, and after the game, fans caught slant passes of free jambalaya mix  as they left the stadium.

That’s naturally Uptown Nawlins.

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